"He PUNCHED me!"

We were at a reunion with our adopted dad's family. It was a hot summer day in Washington state and all us cousins were running around outside like puppies with rabies, sweating and foaming at the mouth but having the time of our lives. The adults lounged on the back porch overseeing the charcoal grill and in the family room, enjoying the iced baskets of beer and other adult beverages. My adoptive parents were the only adults sipping Pepsi and  non-alcoholic lemonade.

For us kids, the drink of choice at the day-long reunion was Hawaiian Punch. It was a rarely given party treat since Kool-aid at 5 cents a packet was the day-to-day drink of childhood.  After one particularly challenging game of Hide and Seek, I was red-faced and panting, bent forward while trying to catch my breath. My brother Rex, who uncharacteristically found a couple of unknown cousins willing to play with him, was joyous as he bounded over to me.
"Hey! You look hot. Do you want a Hawaiian Punch?" he asked me, a strange question to ask since we were not in habit of treating each other with kindness and civility. I should have been suspicious, but I wasn't.
"Sure!" I replied.
Rex grinned and drew back his fist in a dramatic wind- up and proceeded to sock me in the nose. Not only was I not prepared to get punched in the face, it was so out character for Rex that I couldn't believe he actually did it. He stood there, smiling like the Cheshire Cat while I yelped, "Whadya do that for?" while holding my throbbing nose.
He said, "Well, you said you wanted a Hawaiian Punch and I gave you one." like somehow that excused his felonious assault on me.
Then I got hopping mad. I did the most evil thing I could think of to get back at him.
I ran and told Harley and Virginia what Rex did to me, punctuated with tears and wailing and pointed fingers in Rex's direction. Harley and Virginia glanced at each other and at the adults standing around, listening to my pitiful story.
"Go tell Rex to come here." said Harley in a rare show of fatherly authority. At home it was Virginia that dealt with disciplinary infractions, with Harley as the henchmen who followed her orders.
Rex appeared at my side in front of the now fully assembled Adult Court of the Spencer Family Reunion.
"So what happened?" Harley asked Rex.
"I asked her if she wanted a Hawaiian Punch and when she said yes, I gave her one." He replied, fully confident in his logic.
"But he PUNCHED me in the nose!"I sobbed, rubbing my nose red with my hand.
The slightly-tipsy crowd of adults roared with laughter. They slapped their knees and hoisted their beer cans in Rex's direction.
 "You gotta give the boy credit, he asked her permission." someone from the back piped up. "Yep, she said she wanted a Hawaiian Punch, so what can you do?"
Harley and Virginia looked at Rex laughing with the crowd, and at me, with a sore but otherwise unhurt nose.
"Alright. That's enough. Go play, and Rex - don't give anyone anymore Hawaiian Punches." Harley waved us away and the royal court disbanded, wandering away to get seconds of Grandma Spencer's cold potato salad and a fresh beer. I knew that if we were at home (where we never had Hawaiian Punch to drink) Rex would have gotten the dickens beat out him, but I could see how that response wouldn't have flown very well at the reunion. Rex got very, very lucky that day.

We went back to playing and the afternoon wore on. I played a game of  "Double Dog Dare You" that was really just an excuse to show off my tree climbing skills and that also gave me an opportunity to kiss a cute cousin in the name of never backing down from a dare.

Hours later the reunion busted up when the cops were called because one of the now very drunk uncles brandished a kitchen knife at his equally drunk wife and was threatening to stab her if she didn't quit whining to the other women about how little their house was.

As our station wagon pulled away from the curb, Virginia turned to Harley and said, "It's ok with me if we never do that again." and he agreed. In the way-way back of the station wagon I watched the drunk uncle being handcuffed and led to the backseat of the police car while the rest of the family gathered around in the dusky light of evening. When we turned the corner and the extended Spencer family clan disappeared from view,  I realized that was the most fun day I'd ever had in my whole life.

Hawaiian Punch, indeed. Good one, Rex, good one.